Happiness Is As Happiness Does

Yesterday I went from turning off the air conditioning to seriously considering turning on the furnace. Those sudden starts to fall are always a little tough to take. Furthermore, this week it’s back-to-school for most kids (and teachers) in our province - a sure sign that summer is gones-ville. With autumn hanging in the air, I decided a good topic for today’s blog would be “happiness” - specifically how to get it and keep it.

I was enjoying one of the many ezines that make it to my inbox when I can across the URL for the Happiness Club. With a name like that I just had to check it out. Sure enough, it was exactly what it sounds like - a virtual club for happiness. Their mission is to promote the benefits of being happy through meetings, newsletters, and an informative website. In addition to a site full of resources related to being happy, they run a virtual happiness club for those folks who aren’t near one of the in-person Happiness Clubs they support. How fun! It’s like Weight Watchers with better food.

For those of you looking to stock up your arsenal against the upcoming season of SAD, here are some “happy” thoughts to ponder.

Lionel Kitchian, the founder of happinessclub.com, defines happiness “as an inner state of well-being that enables you to profit from your highest thoughts, intelligence, wisdom, awareness, common sense, emotions, health, and spiritual values.”

Wow, that’s a lot of benefit. So how does one achieve this? First it is important to realize that happiness is a skill that can be learned. It is a decision. Happiness is based on your thoughts and at any moment you are free to choose different thoughts. Granted it may take some practice, but it is very empowering to know it is as simple as choosing more positive thoughts.

In one of the free e-books on the site, Happy 4 Life: Here’s How To Do It, Dr. Bob Nozik suggests the following strategies to let your happiness flow:

Conscious Awareness - Most of us blaze through our days mindlessly following routines and focused on something in our future (how that meeting will go, what to make for dinner, how to remove that dog vomit stain from the dining room carpet, etc.) When we do that we keep ourselves in a state of perpetual “hurriedness” and we miss the beauty and wonder of the world around us. Before leaving the house tomorrow, take a few deep breaths and release your thoughts of the day to come. As you make your way to work, focus on things around you. Is the sun shining? Are there flowers on your route? What unexpected sights bring a smile to your face? When you focus on and appreciate the world right in front of you, you take in the endless miracles waiting for you each day.

Gratitude - This is my all-time favourite emotion. If I am feeling down and finding it hard to reach for other positive thoughts, I can always get to gratitude. In an instant, it changes my whole mood. Gratitude is so powerful because it comes from such a pure and genuine part of ourselves. Next time you are drenched in negative or unhappy thoughts and feelings, start thinking about the things in your life for which you are grateful. Start small and build up from there. You will be amazed at how quickly the dark clouds part and the sun shines through. 

Acceptance - This can be a hard one for many people. Many of us rail against the way things are and fight to make them the way we want them to be. Several years ago my Nana made a beautiful cross-stitch picture for me with the Serenity Prayer on it. As a gentle person full of wisdom and love, I suspect she realized just how needed and meaningful a gift it would be. I often think of those words:

The Serenity Prayer

God, grant me the serenity

To accept things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

- Rienhold Niebuhr

 Perfection - In one way this strategy is full of irony, while in another way it is perfectly balanced. Part of this strategy is recognizing that perfection is an unattainable standard and that we should abandon the desire for it. Perfectionism leads to perpetual dissatisfaction and all the ills that go with it. However the balance to that is the belief that we are already perfect just as we are. In order to find true inner happiness, you must accept that you are perfect right now in this moment. Everything in your life has brought you to this place and it is right where you are supposed to be. Perfection is not something to strive to attain but a pre-existing condition within you to embrace.

My spirit is feeling lighter already. The sun just came out and is shining through the window here. I think I will walk around my yard and count my blessings. So long for now. Have a wonderful day.

For more inspiring information about happiness, check out HappinessClub.com. and maybe even start a happiness club in your community.